I don't think anybody could really buy "The Reluctant Metrosexual" by Peter Hyman (don't go there with his last name) for anything but the name. A positive endorsement from somebody associated with The Onion tipped the scales in Hyman's favor but having gotten through a majority of it, I can firmly say the following: it sucks. And I don't use italics all that often.

The problem is that while it's supposed to be a hip, tongue-in cheek, self-deprecating piece of wry humor (at least that's what it seems), it's missing all the elements that support and make all of that funny. It's not hip, it's wannabe hip: Hyman's obscure references, supposedly erudite vocabulary, and extended hypothetical situations are incoherent and thrown in for the sake of nothing else which makes them, in my honest opinion, stooooopid and even shallow. It gets annoying by the 3rd page (and that's still in the introduction!).

Metrosexuality also has nothing to do with it. As with his prose, he seems less of a metrosexual and more of a jealous metrosexual wannabe. You're supposed to read about his experiences and laugh, but I at least end up being continually annoyed and disgusted by how shallow a man is created through this book. The disclaimer "oh it's just me ranting ha ha take it at face value poo poo on me" makes it all the worse self-deprecation is usually not supposed to be taken literally. If the books is really worthless, why did you publish it and waste my money, which is what I think you've done!?! *grunts with much frustration*

So I haven't finished all of it. Do I give in to my practical side and endure the torture of about 100 more pages of this stupidity? Then Hyman, damn you, wins! But if I don't read it, I'm wasting my money, but Hyman you already have your money damn you, wins again! You're a clever one Hyman. You have already won. And with the simple ploy of replacing the content of a book (wait for it...wait for it...wait f) with crap. Arrrrrr, ya got me this time.

PS You read through the drivel I just wrote? Yeah, I'm sorry about that but hey you're the one who read thorugh it. "The Reluctant Metrosexual" is like that except it's not, in that it's even worse. Like, an italicized hojillion times worse. I wish a thousand razors burns and mismatched patterns upon you Peter Hyman!